Sally's Circle: How to Honor Lost Loved Ones this Thanksgiving

Hi there! I'm Marisa. Erin asked me to guest blog today, and I'm so happy to have a chance to chat with you.

I recently started a blog called Sally's Circle, a safe place for anyone who has a parent who is sick or has passed away. My mom, Sally, is the inspiration. She was my best friend: "that cool mom" who laughed loud, lent me her clothes, and stayed up late just so we could talk. In 2000, she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She fought for 2 1/2 years and passed away in 2002. I was 20.

Six years have passed. I miss her terribly, but I've also found a lot of happiness. I love my writing career. I play drums with a supercute indie-pop band. And I'm counting down the days to Thanksgiving.

Turkey Day has always been my favorite holiday. Ever since I was a kid, my family has piled in the car and driven to Connecticut to spend a few days with my mom's relatives. Especially as a teenager, the trip was a mini-vacation. I helped name the turkey ("Tom" usually won), stayed up late engrossed in a novel, and enjoyed the break from my drama-overload friends.

But now, without my mom, it's different. Holidays can be hard for anyone, and they're especially tough when you've lost someone close.

The first Thanksgiving without my mom was the worst. My dad and I drove for three hours in near-silence. For the first time in 20 years, I sat shotgun. I hated it because it reminded me she was gone. Before the feast, at a table surrounded with 10 of my mom's relatives, Uncle Stuart cleared his throat: "Let us pray for our dear, sweet Sally. We miss you and love you." We all ate with lumps in our throats.