Parenting styles: Types, advantages and disadvantages

Being a parent is not a follow-come skill like a brand-new smartphone and its charger. As there are different faces and characters on the planet, so are many parents with their parenting styles. Whatever parenting style you choose determines how mentally strong, well-rounded and successful your child will be.

Yes, not all parents are meant to be parents in the first place. However, as long as you’ve brought a young one into the world, you must ensure the child turns out to be an asset to society. Unfortunately, not all children turn out that way, and it usually boils down to one thing – the parenting styles they were raised in.

So what are the parenting styles we keep hammering on? Let’s take a look.

Table of Content hide 1What is parenting style? 2Parenting styles and their advantages and disadvantages 2.1Authoritative parenting style 2.1.1Advantages 2.1.2Disadvantages 2.2Authoritarian parenting style 2.2.1Advantage 2.2.2Disadvantages 2.3Permissive parenting style 2.3.1Advantages 2.3.2Disadvantages 2.4Neglectful parenting style 2.4.1Advantages 2.4.2Disadvantages 3Conclusion

What is parenting style?

Parenting style is a psychological term to describe parents’ standard strategies for raising their children. The term first became popular based on the work of Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist, and Stanford researchers Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin.

Parenting styles also describe how a parent responds to and makes demands on their children.

Parenting styles and their advantages and disadvantages

In the 1960s, Baumrind conducted a study on more than 100 preschool-age children. She discovered some dimensions of parenting styles using naturalistic observation, parental interviews, and other research methods. These dimensions include disciplinary strategies, warmth and nurturing, communication styles, and expectations of maturity and control. Based on these dimensions, Baumrind developed different parenting styles which parents use to raise their children. The parenting styles are authoritative, authoritarian, permissive and neglectful parenting.

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Authoritative parenting style

Authoritative parents establish rules and guidelines that their children are expected to follow. However, authoritative parents follow a democratic approach. Here are the advantages and disadvantages:

Advantages

• Most celebrated parenting style.
• Authoritative parents are responsive to their children and willing to listen to them.
• Allow natural consequences to occur (for instance, failing a school exam) but offer guidance on overcoming the failures.
• Set clear rules and expectations for their kids but practice understanding and tolerance.
• Children raised by parents who show them respect often grow up to show the same courtesy to others.
• They are raised and better equipped to take on leadership roles.

Disadvantages

It’s hard to see many drawbacks of the authoritative parenting style. However, one disadvantage that stands out is that this style is difficult to implement with kids going through the normal phases of rebellion, anger and apathy. The authoritative parenting style requires a delicate balance of discipline and freedom. As parents continue to stay firm and outline the consequences of poor behaviour, they also have to give their rebellious kids the freedom to explore. Hence, there is always a clash of interests which can lead to a crack in the parent-child relationship.

Authoritarian parenting style

This parenting style expects children to follow the strict rules established by the parents. Unlike the authoritative parenting style, authoritarian is not democratic at all. Failure to follow set rules often results in punishment.

Advantage

• Children have a good understanding of what is and isn’t acceptable due to the crystal clear rules set down for them.
• Risky behaviour a child may engage in is low.
•  Children raised by authoritarian parents are goal-driven due to adhering to detailed plans that include precise instructions.

Disadvantages

• Authoritarian parents are highly demanding and often less responsive to their children’s opinions or needs.
• Their communication skill is low. They only set down rules which must be followed whether their children like them or not.
• Children raised with this parenting style grow up with low self-esteem.
• They are used to following rules and feel insecure and unsure when confronted with issues with no set down rules.
• They are emotionally withdrawn due to constant yelling and criticisms from their parents.
• Some of the children become rebellious, which could hurt them in the long run just because they’re tired of following instructions.

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Permissive parenting style

In permissive parenting, parents are more responsive than demanding. They are the “cool parents”, every teenager’s dream parent, because they are often lenient with their children and allow them all the freedom they can get, sometimes at their own expense.

Advantages

• Communicate openly and usually lets their kids decide for themselves.
• Rules and expectations are often not set or rarely enforced.
• Permissive parents want their children to be happy and are willing to permit anything for that.
• With unlimited freedom, children who grow up with this parenting style are often creative, having been given all the freedom to explore and experiment with different passions and hobbies.
• They can express themselves freely.

Disadvantages

• Too much freedom can lead to risky behaviours in the children, such as unsafe sex and substance abuse.
• These children often grow up with an entitlement mentality. As in, they must have their way in everything.
• Parents may eventually lose the reverence and respect of their children.

Neglectful parenting style

In addition to Baurimund’s parenting styles, psychologists Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin proposed a fourth style – neglectful or uninvolved parenting. Neglectful parents are generally detached from their child’s life. They may provide the basic needs, but that’s where it ends as far as parenting is concerned.

Advantages

• Since the children are left to grow independently, they are often self-motivated and stand a great chance of weathering through the storms of life with little or no help.
• These children often don’t grow up with post-traumatic stress associated with others that grew up with controlling parents.

Disadvantages

• Lack of emotional attachments in children who grow up with neglectful parents. This is where fear of intimacy and daddy issues often originates from.
• They are more prone to risky behaviours like substance abuse, sexual abuse and other societal ills.
• Children their parents neglect are often victims of child abuse since they have no one to protect them.
• They often struggle with their own self-esteem issues.

Conclusion

From the discussion above, the authoritative parenting style seems to be the best method for raising independent, well-balanced and well-behaved children. Of course, it comes with its own disadvantage, but it’s still better than other parenting styles listed above in so many ways. However, there should be no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting. What matters is that moderation should be applied in everything so your children stand a better chance of not missing out on crucial things that will benefit them as they grow into adulthood.

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