How To Go From Reality TV Dating to a Real Engagement: My Q & A with a Former Bachelor Contestant!
Sadie: On The Bachelor, it's like there is a group of 25 starving women with a cheeseburger in the middle of them...even if you're a vegetarian, you want a bite. It's very difficult NOT to be somewhat competitive in that type of setting. However, all of the competition, glitz, and glamour didn't really affect the way I felt. I really tried to compartmentalize and be as natural as possible. Although, I'm not going to lie, it's really weird hearing a chick gush about her make out session with the guy you're about to go on a gondola with in Venice—nothing normal about that.
Erin: What, if anything, did you learn about love from the show?
Sadie: Being on the show didn't really teach me anything about love. However, the experience taught me a ton about myself. With all of the downtime and lack of TV, email, phones, family, and friends, I realized how important it is to never lose yourself in a relationship—from the beginning. It's key to have your own life. We need our time with our girlfriends, family...time for yoga, reading, etc.—total ME time. Dating is a piece of cake if you let be just that—a piece of your whole life; not the whole thing. If the dude becomes too much of the focus, life gets thrown off-balance and you end up becoming way too concerned with how you're being perceived and how you feel about the person instead of just letting it happen naturally. Side note: no guy wants a girl to be totally focused on him...that's fun for about a minute and then it just becomes unattractive. Guys like chicks with full and complete lives, with or without them.
Erin: How did you meet your fiance?
Sadie: Rogers and I had a ton of mutual friends in LA, but we never officially linked up until The Bachelor contacted him to interview him to be the next Bachelor. While they were interviewing Rogers, he asked the casting team for my contact info instead because he and his fam had seen me on the show (his mom actually said at one point, "Rogers, you should find a girl like Sadie from The Bachelor...Actually, why don't you just date Sadie?"). He ended up emailing me through Facebook and then he flew out to CA from Dallas for our first date. I've never been pursued like that and it was the best first date I had ever had...we couldn't stop talking and he was so funny and handsome. He was exactly what I had been hoping for.
Erin: Is it all luck, or being open to it, or what? How does one make a relationship a reality?
Sadie: I don't think there's any way to necessarily "make" a relationship a reality. I really believe the more you focus on you, others will too. The more you live your life as fully as possible, with or without a guy, the happier you will be and the more attractive you will be when you do meet someone. Always be open though. Sometimes the craziest idea (like saying yes to a guy flying to you to take you on a date) ends up being the best thing that ever happened to you. Life is full of unexpected twists and turns and if you can learn to really roll with it (even when you don't understand), the better you'll be for it in the end.
Thank you, Sadie!! Congrats on the engagement and good luck with everything!
Girls, isn't Sadie adorable? Don't you love the way she met her fiance? What'd you think of the Bachelor Pad finale last night?
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Photo: Russell Baer Photography
